Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Hard.

I thought I woke up years ago when I realized what I wanted to do.

I never really was successful in track. I did the hard training, never missed a practice and worked out hard everyday in highschool. I was too short, too tired, lacked sleep. I guess I never tried hard enough or be able to push my self even though my brain wanted me to move faster, my heart wanted to move faster. But my legs could never keep up the same intensity.

Sure I'm faster than some people, but I still might consider my self "average" against the normal racing crowd.

I played world of warcraft for about 4 years. If I put in /played there would be probably be too many hours played in that game that when I look back into it I'm pretty ashamed. Those were times I could of been sleeping. Oh how much sleep I missed. I wasn't even that great at PvP. I never even touched 2k rating. Maybe having to be a hunter in pvp was a horrible choice and should of switched to a rogue much longer ago.But still.So much time wasted. I finally realized how much this poison was taking my life. It hit my grades in the years of high school and much more dramatically now in college. I quit the toxic nonsense.


I'm one year behind in college and I'm despising my self everyday because of it. I hate it. I hate it more than that weird guy with the broken teeth in Dynamic Edition. I hate it more than the stinking bums who sleep in their piss stained clothes and shit stench that you can smell from across the train car in the F train. I hate it more than all the lag I had to go through when dealing with dialup and the disconnections when people called. I hate it more than the days I got bullied in elementary and I hate it more than the days I got bullied as a freshman.

Fall 2007
BIOL - 10000 Principles Of Biol I F
ENGL - 12000 Expository Writing A
ORSEM - 00100 First Year Seminar A
POLSC - 11200 Political Theory (w A-
MATH - 12500 Precalculus D

Spring 2008
POLSC - 11000 Am Govt:hist Intro(w B
PSYCH - 10000 Intro To Psychology A-
RELIGION - 30900 Meaning:love & Sex(I thought it was the psychology version)
 C+
CHEM - 11500 Introductory Chem A-

Fall 2008
BIOL - 10000 Principles Of Biol I D
ENGL - 22000 Introduction To Lit B
MATH - 12500 Precalculus D

I feel if I put this up. I can't deny how much I've been affected by the four years of constantly staying up late, playing WoW. I'm glad I finally stopped. It was an addiction.

As of spring 2009 I'm taking these courses
BIOL - 10200 Principles Of Biol 2
CHEM - 100LC Essen-gen Chem (lec)
CHEM - 101LB Ess Of Gen Chem-lab
MUSHL - 10100 Intro To Music
ARTLA - 10100 Intro:stdy Vis Exper

I'm attemping 15 credits.

So far on my first Chem test I recieved an 85. The class average was a 60.
I'm heading towards the right direction.

But bio 102...it's still giving me a hard time. The multiple choice was beyond difficult.
This is the results from the entire class in Bio 102.

You don't have to go through the entire list, just skim at percentages that people got.

Code Points (out of 125) Percent
100399200 93 74.4
100460863 49 39.2
100560266 0 0
101480430 37 29.6
106222563 77 61.6
106992684 81 64.8
107199922 9 7.2 lol
109184357 45 36
109926419 37 29.6
110195858 41 32.8
111209084 89 71.2
111859162 61 48.8
114323517 45 36
116452590 29 23.2
117533283 81 64.8
118624891 73 58.4
119727527 0 0
120841300 101 80.8
121966323 69 55.2
123102710 37 29.6
124250576 65 52
125410036 69 55.2
126581208 57 45.6
128959162 85 68
130062956 49 39.2
130166184 49 39.2
131385398 41 32.8
132486576 73 58.4
141593070 61 48.8
142927707 61 48.8
144782871 57 45.6
145637560 57 45.6
148402435 53 42.4
151223448 25 20
155958899 37 29.6
160034831 53 42.4
161555748 29 23.2
163092029 57 46
164941564 69 55.2
166134831 57 45.6
166211300 65 52
167794606 65 52
169393905 0 0
170925663 33 26.4
171009359 81 64.8
174307384 65 52
175990287 73 58.4
182722717 93 74.4
182783778 49 39.2
186302871 57 45.6
186676133 85 68
188089122 49 39.2
191715936 41 32.8
193111764 45 36
193224388 85 68
197312695 33 26.4
199191975 57 45.6
200241066 53 42.4
201144419 33 26.4
203044221 77 61.6
203080221 21 16.8
209005742 61 48.8
209591228 61 48.8
209922003 89 71.2
210984951 65 52
210985544 53 42.4
211020951 53 42.4
213038516 81 64.8
215076643 41 32.8
215112643 53 42.4
217171538 65 52
218220357 0 0
219251412 41 32.8
221772615 0 0
226190057 0 0
226613497 37 29.6
227856966 0 0
228227122 69 55.2
228995162 49 39.2
229916277 65 52
232354226 29 23.2
233888799 93 74.4
234560008 53 42.4
238999701 0 0
239112004 61 48.8
241431680 69 55.2
244975010 25 20
246177555 97 77.6
248424472 73 58.4
248568277 81 64.8
249451797 37 29.6
250965077 73 58.4
253422344 81 64.8
254386300 33 26.4
255886454 33 26.4
256159564 53 42.4
258338911 89 71.2
259883064 65 52
260852799 9 7.2
260957010 65 52
265222444 41 32.8
266693221 73 58.4
266833797 45 36
267830606 53 42.4
267892977 53 42.4
268583557 37 29.6
272796992 61 48.8
273182857 33 26.4
273834399 73 58.4
276496665 0 0
276514444 57 45.6
277265874 45 36
278993010 81 64.8
279193598 77 61.6
279287488 61 48.8
281899951 0 0
283917919 89 71.2
284651797 73 58.4
284722563 81 64.8
284789384 49 39.2
285935919 65 52
287224472 89 71.2
287431472 97 77.6
287467472 73 58.4
290239224 93 74.4
290275555 65 52
291589899 33 26.4
291839224 69 55.2
295850162 21 16.8
298869797 53 42.4
299148004 69 55.2
299257224 57 45.6
299327228 85 68
299467680 77 61.6
301756745 57 45.6
301997666 41 32.8
304709176 53 42.4
304745777 0 0
305035577 73 58.4
310839949 45 36
311886717 61 48.8
313746675 97 77.6
314120516 77 61.6
316820238 81 64.8
316856554 57 45.6
319924846 109 87.2
319942211 93 74.4
320877300 41 32.8
322428231 57 45.6
323060814 53 42.4
323076644 81 64.8
323709450 57 45.6
324059766 37 29.6
329886974 57 45.6
330202184 45 36
333791037 41 32.8
335942223 81 64.8
335960621 57 45.6
338838911 65 52
339222257 61 48.8
339400281 69 55.2
340307779 73 58.4
342571141 77 61.6
344431492 57 45.6
344996668 37 29.6
346141564 77 61.6
348240277 85 68
349719127 73 58.4
352785050 45 36
356252544 61 48.8
357074471 73 58.4
363257058 0 0
363275077 69 55.2
363318455 41 32.8
368565848 49 39.2
369429905 53 42.4
370476665 77 61.6
374104646 57 45.6
374122717 0 0
375265874 69 55.2
376928837 109 87.2
377042891 89 71.2
377589141 61 48.8
377636007 65 52
377648490 61 48.8
377769535 81 64.8
377787775 21 16.8
379370714 69 55.2
381508665 61 48.8
385247874 61 48.8
389043678 77 61.6
392913809 61 48.8
394499218 57 45.6
395940099 41 32.8
395976112 65 52
396750679 85 68
399696060 53 42.4
399764675 45 36
408623577 41 32.8
411510036 57 45.6
411912004 45 36
416709771 53 42.4
420823364 105 84
420859364 37 29.6
422396050 37 29.6
422876665 45 36
422991464 37 29.6
424978509 81 64.8
425096969 89 71.2
425709037 29 23.2
429211626 65 52
431421398 77 61.6
432309228 45 36
433415188 41 32.8
435586626 85 68
437715488 61 48.8
440698662 85 68
441629070 81 64.8
442023062 61 48.8
442041066 113 90.4
446392346 49 39.2
446428346 65 52
448089771 53 42.4
449823153 85 68
450662662 81 64.8
450805767 69 55.2
452059062 69 55.2
454632164 29 23.2
455593626 85 68
458641580 45 36
459823764 85 68
464467655 69 55.2
468170455 89 71.2
468909760 101 80.8
468945760 81 64.8
473550626 61 48.8
473568622 49 39.2
475954287 69 55.2
477032289 0 0
477841755 89 71.2
478256666 0 0
478605580 73 58.4
481086580 0 0
482973464 37 29.6
483009464 61 48.8
486320871 85 68
487756388 101 80.8
487792383 33 26.4
488329905 45 36
488762298 65 52
492623624 97 77.6
497733472 77 61.6
499511378 57 45.6
499673313 77 61.6
499726015 45 36
499745771 93 74.4
502414991 73 58.4
503062221 61 48.8
505664141 85 68
506037555 65 52
507376112 89 71.2
511211378 77 61.6
512405527 49 39.2
513020516 65 52
517485745 57 45.6
517503766 69 55.2
518660891 41 32.8
522432955 117 93.6
522617278 45 36
527800644 97 77.6
527818544 0 0
529293617 61 48.8
533054366 81 64.8
533072368 57 45.6
533240050 41 32.8
533321745 81 64.8
534070831 49 39.2
534542008 73 58.4
538360976 65 52
539968622 65 52
544489141 53 42.4
546410290 61 48.8
549080655 21 16.8
550083557 37 29.6
554388156 85 68
554531492 81 64.8
556698205 49 39.2
558356911 41 32.8
560055043 73 58.4
565580205 65 52
566549492 37 29.6
571215540 101 80.8
571233888 33 26.4
572659130 65 52
576889999 61 48.8
577197540 61 48.8
582639007 85 68
582819778 73 58.4
588428211 57 45.6
588660266 89 71.2
591198217 89 71.2
591276050 57 45.6
594258898 81 64.8
599148889 65 52
600164855 53 42.4
600193221 77 61.6
600398205 45 36
601126419 41 32.8
606131373 53 42.4
606149322 97 77.6
610487797 41 32.8
612140134 33 26.4
612176133 101 80.8
613056516 53 42.4
618245772 81 64.8
622606142 69 55.2
623528946 53 42.4
624376333 85 68
624412901 41 32.8
629152927 37 29.6
630588156 69 55.2
630624194 61 48.8
630769384 61 48.8
632616344 69 55.2
638227122 37 29.6
639195533 45 36
639260891 69 55.2
642939007 53 42.4
643199478 61 48.8
644311825 33 26.4
649600877 49 39.2
649636112 61 48.8
652342297 37 29.6
656084875 101 80.8
661591748 85 68
662598217 101 80.8
663650576 65 52
667601778 17 13.6
669231599 57 45.6
674289384 109 87.2
675877488 53 42.4
677588864 29 23.2
684570482 0 0
686815302 49 39.2
688049312 49 39.2
689408888 21 16.8
689426015 57 45.6
696293955 0 0
699084351 73 58.4
699102131 81 64.8
700238471 77 61.6
703231277 37 29.6
707197862 61 48.8
709220357 89 71.2
710202654 89 71.2
710238677 29 23.2
715418704 53 42.4
717280822 69 55.2
718261799 41 32.8
721388477 45 36
724448466 45 36
728851936 65 52
732781966 1 0.8
735153430 53 42.4
736833524 57 45.6
737386580 57 45.6
738983203 53 42.4
744213268 0 0
744351720 57 45.6
746315720 0 0
751259448 37 29.6
755673560 33 26.4
756776667 109 87.2
761276795 77 61.6
762982211 65 52
763128029 77 61.6
768870888 45 36
774325384 69 55.2
776541640 21 16.8
777333472 25 20
784307112 81 64.8
784325899 49 39.2
786338871 57 45.6
789947203 65 52
792116423 33 26.4
800040454 0 0
801516430 57 45.6
804333067 97 77.6
809938745 81 64.8
816109533 29 23.2
819033797 93 74.4
819143438 61 48.8
822022003 73 58.4
822905767 61 48.8
824257166 69 55.2
826617208 73 58.4
833025438 81 64.8
833627766 61 48.8
836422657 81 64.8
838043438 113 90.4
839130004 61 48.8
840781966 65 52
840799973 41 32.8
844433524 89 71.2
844453323 81 64.8
845058003 65 52
846763973 65 52
849290176 33 26.4
852286454 49 39.2
852655362 49 39.2
862486974 53 42.4
866228192 0 0
866944120 61 48.8
869941204 45 36
871124194 81 64.8
873297441 73 58.4
875900194 41 32.8
877196943 93 74.4
877383921 77 61.6
879300281 0 0
885291001 73 58.4
901695062 57 45.6
911209533 61 48.8
917399218 77 61.6
917569283 41 32.8
919197666 65 52
922693010 85 68
922791701 77 61.6
926378668 81 64.8
928655121 53 42.4
928673333 77 61.6
928691121 41 32.8
929191464 45 36
933044291 53 42.4
933711094 81 64.8
937957866 89 71.2
937975881 77 61.6
939499701 41 32.8
944302298 85 68
947318455 53 42.4
948110227 81 64.8
948438435 71 56.8
950338745 61 48.8
951212094 73 58.4
954137739 53 42.4
955363218 65 52
955868162 49 39.2
956809701 53 42.4
956827766 69 55.2
966396668 85 68
966700933 105 84
966789546 61 48.8
972925509 85 68
973773333 45 36
976026777 37 29.6
977654007 65 52
979437095 77 61.6
985825546 45 36
988975010 29 23.2
989371298 77 61.6
991751936 49 39.2
996094431 65 52
997220565 69 55.2
998023764 0 0
999304012 65 52
999583372 81 64.8

There is no curve. This is the %'s of what people got in the multiple choice. Either nearly everyone in this class is fucking retarded or this is just a frigging hard class. I was the ones in the "50s". I think two people got a 90 out of the hundred+ students in this class. And these are the people who survived bio 100.

There are two parts to this test. Multiple choice and 2 essays in an hour and a half. I feel like I did massively better in the essay section.

There is only one way to save my self,it's through the final.
The final will replace two tests and double itself to give a high grade.

I still have a chance to redeem myself. But I still might have to retake bio 100 sometime again to replace that fucking D. Same goes for Precal.

I don't have an addiction to blame anymore.
The only person to blame is myself.

Everyday two hours of bio, two hours of chem, hour of art, hour of music

6 hours a day I'll sacrifice.

I need to get those As.
It is my goal.
It is my mission.

posted by BlissStreet @ 11:56 PM 0 comments